Give Women A Break

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For those who are following Indonesian news, last month, the hottest entertainment news would be the passing of Bunga Citra Lestra (BCL)’s husband, Ashraf Sinclair. He passed away due to heart attack at their home.

Unfortunately since then, Media has been given BCL and the family non stop invading attention. I kind of feel sad for her because she might not have a normal healing time like the rest of us. I know BCL from movie Ainun and Habibie which I showed to my class and my kids love it. There were lots of talk about how pretty she was. Not only she is pretty, she is different and a hard worker,  and she has a loving husband and a lovely son, Noah.

I followed her on the media and I hope she is finding way to heal because losing a partner is not an easy task especially due to death. However, I am not here to talk about her, but I am here to talk about the rest of the women. Recently, BCL attended an event (last Friday) due to earlier commitment, she had to attend the event to meet and greet her fans. While she was singing, you could see that she stopped and cried. It was a sad moment and many people understood. However, I love reading comments on videos and there were a few things that made me mad.

There were some people commenting on her not wearing her traditional muslim clothing especially she is grieving, you know what, she is an entertainer and she does have a protocol to follow and she is not going to pretend to wear it to get your forgiveness, move on people. There were people commenting on how quickly she attended an event, it is called professionalism, you made a commitment and you stick to it, cos it is hard for the event organisers and fans too. Also, how do you know that she is sad to stay home and diving into work can help because she does not need to think?

People are quick to judge and comment. I know it is hard not to say something, how about just say to yourself or people around you instead of on the Media. Give woman a break, if this is happening to the men, the comments are far more sympathetic. I do not hate men and this should not happen to them first, but when it comes to women, we were judge way to hard. This is only the start, I got it myself. People judge me for having a separation, for not wanting to find another man, you know what even if I find a man, people will still judge you for finding a man, being a slut, etc.

It is a difficult world for women, and I always thought to myself, if I ever have a child, I do not want girl. Because the world is not yet fair to girl, having sons are hard too because so easily people are turning to you and called you rapists.

I have turned deaf ears to people because I do not really care, people do not know what is going on with you and your life, so just do what you want to do, and if they say anything to you face that is over the line, say to them, my room, my mess, my business.

I am hoping BCL and those who are struggling both men and women to find peace and your healing journey is easy. For those who likes to tell people what to do, FUCK it.

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